"If only we'd stop trying to be happy, we could have a pretty good time."
- Edith Wharton

Friday, March 25, 2011

Lulu Learns an Essential Life Lesson

Here's how most of the little mother-daughter talks between me and Lulu go. "Look, Lulu, I have been through this [insert school problem, sibling squabble, fight with a friend] before and I can save you a lot of pain and suffering if you just listen to my advice." And her responses, while varied, all show that she clearly does not believe that I could possibly have ever been 7, missed a word on a spelling test, fought with my friends, or got irritated at my younger sibling.

But! I have been vindicated! And so thoroughly that she now thinks I am some sort of wise Yoda mother who knows all.

On Monday, Lulu comes home in tears -- tears! -- because some boy at her after-school center likes her friend and not her. And worse this "friend" (who has caused several problems before -- I know I shouldn't hate a 7-year-old, but I kinda sorta hate this one) was now ignoring Lulu.

After some hugs and more tears, I made Lulu sit on my bed and look at me while I told her very firmly that 1. I know this is tough stuff, and unfortunately, it doesn't get any easier and the reason I know this is that I am 36 and still dealing with variations of these issues. And 2. That this so-called friend would come crawling back before the end of the week because I know for a fact that no 2nd grade boy is going to stay interested in a 1st grade girl for more than a few days.

Skeptical, she peered up at me and said, "You don't know that, mama!" But I do, I said. And sure enough, when I picked her up yesterday, she was playing with the girl. I asked what had happened and she said, eyes all big, "You were RIGHT, mama! Chase doesn't want to play with Olivia anymore. HOW did you know that?" I told her, look, Lulu, I know stuff. Pretty much anything that will happen to you has happened to me and I can tell you how it's going to play out. So listen up next time, ok?

Friday, March 18, 2011

The Big Reveal, part 2

And now for a big announcement!

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No, I'm not marrying P (are you crazy??) or pregnant (god forbid). But I did start a new blog and I'd love for you to check it out (especially you random paint color junkies... you know who you are). It's called Amateur Decorator. Come on over and visit! I'll still keep posting my standard life drama here, of course.

The Big Reveal, part 1

So it turns out I chose my paint colors well -- I love, love, love my new bedroom and bathroom. What a massive transformation!

Without further ado, here are the before and after shots.

















































































































































What do you think? It's not quite finished yet. I'm still waiting on new end tables (they're actually Flint metal bar stools from CB2!) and I'm not sure where various art pieces will end up (I think the Escapes print will probably get relocated to the living room), but it's close! Oh, and I did touch up a few things between the time I took the photos and today ... new light switch and outlet plate covers, more panels on the windows, a new sconce above the bathroom mirror.

Now on to the kitchen ...

Where It All Came From ...
Bedroom:
Paint - Benjamin Moore Chelsea Gray in Aura Matte on walls, Sherwin Williams Extra White in gloss on trim and built-ins
Bedding - Dwell for Target
Light fixture - Ikea
"Escape" painting - CB2
Desk - West Elm
White shelving - Ikea
Headboard - West Elm
Gray curtains - Target
White sheers - Ikea

Bathroom:
Paint - Benjamin Moore Sanctuary in Aura Matte
Towels - CB2
Towel bars and knobs - West Elm

Monday, March 7, 2011

The Painters Are Here!

Today is big day. You may recall that I have a slight interest in obsession with paint. Well, my painters are here for round 1 of a two-part painting extravaganza. Part 1, which will take three days, is my bedroom (including the hideous knotty-pine built-ins) and bathroom. Part 2, coming in April (to coincide with bonus time), will be the kitchen cabinets and walls, and the living/dining room, (which my mom, sister, and I painted when I moved in back in July, but the color is just not quite right and the painter is pretty cheap). There's really nothing like paint to transform a space, and somehow it recharges me mentally as well. I can't wait to see how it all comes together -- I've only spent about six months buying sample pots, studying blog and magazine photos, and pondering Moonshine vs Horizon vs Coventry Gray. I went with Ben. Moore Chelsea Gray (a medium true gray -- or so I hope!) on the bedroom walls with White Dove on the ceiling and Aura Sanctuary (a grayish purple) for the bathroom. Now is the moment of truth ... did I choose right?

Obsessing over paint and getting everything ready for the painters has prevented me from obsessing over P. I'm not sure what we're doing. We talked a long time on Tuesday night and I realized something pretty amazing and powerful ... I don't know what I want. And that's ... fine. I get so caught up in not wanting to make a(nother) mistake, not wanting to be taken for granted (again) ... just wanting to get. things. right. that I haven't spent enough time embracing the opportunity I have right now to take my time. There's no pressure on me or P to know what the future holds, no reason to make promises we both know all too well are much easier to say than to keep. I like P and I like having him in my life. The only question is what form that will take. And the only answer (right now at least) is I don't know.

So we've left things at that. We spent a lot of time together this weekend, much of it with my family (the first time he's been around my mom, stepdad, sister, and brother-in-law), and it was fun and relaxed and not weighed down by needing it to be anything more than a bunch of people having a good time. He stayed over Saturday night and it was so much fun watching him interact with Lulu and Boo in the morning. They climbed all over him, he pretended to be a horse bucking them off, I made everyone breakfast and then since it was such a gray, rainy day, we all curled up in my room and watched Enchanted.

It's not always as easy as it was this weekend, but I love (and will try to remember more often) that I am constantly learning. Whether it's a good weekend or an argument, I always come away seeing myself in a new light, with a new insight into some part of who I am in a relationship. Who knows? Maybe someday I will even know what I want.